Intolerance

We are often met with so many messages encouraging us to be more tolerant.

Today I wanted to explore being intolerant.

I think this is a relevant topic any day of the year. And for some, it can be perfect timing to help you navigate the holiday season, which is not always easy.

As I look back at my life experiences, I find so many instances which I considered disrespectful (and probably “abusive” if I were more honest with myself).

From this, two things have become clear to me.

1. Intolerance: I have become intolerant to certain behaviors in my personal relationships including demeaning, contemptuous, aggressive, gaslighting and controlling behavior. When I say I have become intolerant, I mean it literally. My body, perhaps due to the accumulated experiences over a lifetime, or perhaps due to my sensitivity (sensitivity not being a bad word in my world), has a hard time when these occur. It is especially difficult if this happens unexpectedly and intensely with someone I have a personal relationship with. Fortunately these instances are now few and far between as I have developed discernment and have very clear boundaries.

2. Other People’s attempt to Influence: The second thing I have noticed over my lifetime is a multitude of people who have tried to convince me to be more “understanding” or more “tolerant” every time these instances have occurred. This has come as asking me, in one way or another, to tolerate and excuse these behaviors due to the person’s title, culture, age or other excuse.

Eventually, after much heartache, and years of not feeling well, I have learned in recent years to refuse to tolerate these behaviors no matter what anyone thinks.

And it has not been an easy journey.

Now, despite all my life lessons and having really solid boundaries in general, last week I again found myself in a difficult interaction of this sort.

And, again, I was met with a 3rd person asking me to understand (excuse) the behavior.

And I started to second guess myself…

For a moment, I wondered if I should try to learn to be more tolerant.

Maybe if I were more tolerant, I wouldn’t get affected, sad, angry, hurt, and depleted by these things when they occur.

This self-doubt lasted less than one second, after which I made a clear choice.

I do not want to become more tolerant!

I love my intolerance!

Yes, I have suffered at times. I have had to set boundaries which is not easy. I have had to have difficult conversations and had to remove myself temporarily or permanently from people or situations. Yes, sometimes, it’s painful, lonely and it has not always been easy to recover.

But I have learned so much from these experiences, and I feel like I am now more internally stable, very much at ease, and stronger than ever!

And I know that part of this is due to my refusal to tolerate these behaviors in my personal relationships. I do “understand” or have an idea where they come from. I do not automatically attribute bad intention to others. I do not hate anyone. But I will not allow these in my life anymore. Period.

Instead, I choose to connect to people who do not do these (or try to convince others to accept them).

As someone who has felt so many “autoimmune symptoms” at different points in my lifetime, I have absolutely no doubt that if I go against myself on this, I will get one.

And I refuse to intentionally participate in this.

Please note this is not about forgiveness which I feel I have done completely about everything and everyone, including myself. Failure to forgive would also be going “against myself” which, I am not planning to ever intentionally do.

Life is not easy. I hope sharing my experiences today serves someone who might be experiencing similar challenges in their Life.

I truly believe that “peace on earth” begins with “peace within.”

And awareness of what we participate in is an important element of this.

Thank you again, to every one of you, for being here with me in 2025 as we explore Life together!

Wishing everyone (including myself) a peaceful and happy in the new year!

Lots of love,

Sandy 🌹

---

Gratitude Section

Today, I am feeling gratitude for my conversation with Trudi Jane who reminded me about eating toxic soup.

---

IN-PERSON EVENTS

Jan 3, 2026 - POWER FULL Workshop

Ashtanga Yoga Montreal

Are you ready to feel POWER FULL?

Join me for a nourishing and interactive 2-hour workshop designed especially for the Ashtanga community.

Together, we will explore the profound difference between living from Power and using Force, which drains energy and creates tension.

We will discuss the Ten Powers that exist and are available to you at all times. This workshop will help you get clarity about how you can live in Peace and Power in these turbulent times.

Register here:

Starting Jan 25 - Weekly SELF-LEADERSHIP GROUP

Meta1111 - Montreal

More details coming soon

---

My Bookstore