Are you "VERY" busy?
“I’m so busy,” I’ve heard myself and others say.
I can sense that being a “busy person” can sometimes make us feel like we are more “valuable” than “non-busy people”.
It makes me wonder if we get some kind of relief (although temporary) by always “doing something”?
Maybe it gives us a sense of control?
A sense of being useful?
A distraction from real issues we have not dealt with?
A sense of belonging to something?
Or maybe just being in charge of our life?
In my experience, busyness can sometimes be a way of avoiding accountability.
Accountability entails a certain level of awareness and honestly.
Here are some examples:
In some cases, being honest might mean acknowledging feeling sad or helpless about something before rushing to do something about it. Staying with the feeling long enough to get more clarity about it might lead us to choose a different act, or maybe even choose to do nothing about it.
In other cases, accountability might mean pausing to look at whether we are getting a feeling of belonging by being busy with something, instead of addressing a deeper sense of unaddressed loneliness or childhood neglect.
Or perhaps, we might notice being busy as a way to feel constantly “needed” which might invite us to read about codependency and how to unlearn such tendencies.
It’s certainly easier not to look at any of these, of course, and just carry on.
And I do not judge this choice since there is a time and place for everything. And of course, sometimes busyness is not avoidance.
But in the big picture, if our busyness is a chronic way of avoiding to look at things deeply, it is unlikely, in my experience, that we can find a lasting sense of wellbeing and clarity.
The harder path is sometimes the one we need to move towards if it holds some Truths we need to see, albeit painful ones.
The Truth, no matter how painful it is, is a “great” place to be, in my view, since it where we can take a next conscious step instead continuing to move in the unhealthy direction for us.
This is accountability.
Wishing everyone Clarity and Peace.
Sandy 🌹
Please share with someone who might benefit from reading this.
Gratitude Section
Today, I am feeling gratitude for warm clothes, shelter and nice coffee shops during Montreal winters. It has been a cold one!
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Yes, if you’re not busy, you’re lazy… this ideology was definitely set up to make us overwork in order for us to underthink and underfeel.. PS: gratitude section warmed me up (::
Food for thought! I don't know if everybody has much of a choice to be un-busy when they're struggling to meet their basic needs and/or supporting loved ones who are. Makes me think of the hierarchy of needs that's well-known. Anyhow, interesting topic to reflect on...